top 50 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] 111 points 8 months ago (5 children)

Cheetahs are apparently super chill as long as they're not hungry, otherwise they'll eat you so they can be super chill again.

  • source
  • hideshow 9 child comments
  • [–] 58 points 8 months ago (3 children)

    I don't think even a hungry cheetah is going to kill an adult human, they're fast sure but too weak and would be unlikely to engage. They don't show much aggression to humans and are easy to tame. There has never been a lethal attack on humans from a wild cheetah.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 6 child comments
  • [–] 46 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    There has never been a lethal attack on humans from a wild cheetah.

    Recorded. They are so good no human ever survives. 🕵️

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 33 points 8 months ago (4 children)

    Someone is gonna need to double check this, but I feel like it's saw a documentary that said cheetahs are super anxious... in the doc I feel like a guy slept in a makeshift shelter with cheetahs in a thunderstorm to help chill them out.

    It sounds so bizarre that im not actually convinced this wasn't a dream, though...

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 6 child comments
  • [–] 50 points 8 months ago* (2 children)

    Sounds about right. In zoos they sometimes pair cheetah cubs with yellow lab puppies to help them deal with the stress of... existing while being a cheetah, I suppose.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • [–] 43 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    The truth is that everyone should be paired with a dog to help them deal with stress.

    I have mine. It works wonders.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • [–] 24 points 8 months ago (1 child)
  • load more comments (1 reply)
  • load more comments (1 reply)
  • [–] 21 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    There’s a series of photos from a wildlife photographer that are essentially selfies of him with a litter of cheetah cubs that the mother cheetah literally dropped in his lap while she went to go hunt. It’s been theorized that the only reason cheetahs have never been domesticated is that that they’re very difficult to breed in captivity.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
  • [–] 19 points 8 months ago*

    Highly niche hunter go brrr. Not to mention that we look and taste weird. Bony as hell vertical pigs that point sticks at anything threatening aren’t an appetizing meal to the the cat equivalent of a hummingbird

  • source
  • parent
  • load more comments (1 reply)
    [–] 70 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    Cheetahs are not actually dangerous to humans. Their skulls/jaws are pretty small and they are slender to be aerodynamic, and they need to be uninjured to hunt, so they avoid confrontation at all costs, especially with something the size of a human.

  • source
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 45 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (3 children)

    SLIGHT NSFW WARNING

    This year, I had the privilege of seeing such friendliness in person:

    Shot on an ooold camera that still works.

  • source
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [+] [S] 17 points 8 months ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 child)
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [–] 33 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 child)

    It's a trap. He just want you to get closer to pet him.

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 31 points 8 months ago (4 children)

    Domestic cats are not actually much different than wild cats in any way. they're just too small to eat us and raised to be more tame. If your loveable housecat was as big as a cheetah, they might not intentionally attack you out of aggression, but their predator instincts would kick in and would probably play with you until you died and possibly eat you like they do insects, lizards, and any other small creature.

  • source
  • hideshow 7 child comments
  • [–] 21 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    I read an interview with a zoologist which described cats as evolutionarily perfect. Their dna really only varies primarily for size. All cats all over the world have survived with no need to seriously adapt to their environment.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 19 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    no need to seriously adapt to their environment.

    Yeah, cats make everyone and everything adapt to their environment. You have to completely go outside the environment to avoid their influence.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 13 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 child)

    Or snakes. Like, big snakes.

    I swear, if a housecat sees a noodle, some "I'm born to paw this to death" switch goes off in their heads.

    See: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3rH5GxeyusM

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SIcpg_pFbF8

    Interestingly, big cats aren't like that. They don't like snakes, and I think they're too big to dodge them.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • load more comments (1 reply)
  • load more comments (1 reply)
    [–] 30 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    Cheetahs aren’t dangerous to humans, they hang out with and even nuzzle up to wildlife photographers all the time.

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 9 points 8 months ago (5 children)

    I mean they aren't lions, but are you telling me that they're tamer than house cats? Because I definitely wouldn't trust a cheetah-sized house cat.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 6 child comments
  • load more comments (4 replies)
  • [–] 27 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    Fun fact: cheetahs can purr and meow.

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 18 points 8 months ago (5 children)

    Just imagine it lapping at the juices leaking from the shredded remains of your face. Glad to help!

  • source
  • hideshow 6 child comments
  • load more comments (4 replies)
    [–] 15 points 8 months ago

    Ah, the danger blep

  • source
  • [–] 12 points 8 months ago

    They meow as well.

  • source
  • [–] 11 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    Cheetahs aren't dangerous, they're big zoomy cats

    Since they min-maxed for speed, they're not very strong and don't really fight for their food, they get bullied easily

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [–] 8 points 8 months ago

    Sometimes I conjure up the delusion that having a big feline is doable if raised from birth because my little feline is such an adorable baby that she shows her belly to literally everyone she sees even when she's never met them. But even this cute ball of fluff will dig her claws into my leg to avoid falling when she rolls over while napping on my lap. Imagine if those claws were 4 cm.

  • source
  • [–] 8 points 8 months ago

    Go on then, give it a Boop then!

  • source
  • [–] 7 points 8 months ago

    They are too intimidated to attack you from the front, so they play nice

  • source
  • [–] 7 points 8 months ago

    Fatal attraction.

  • source
  • [–] 6 points 8 months ago

    It's just a big cat.

  • source
  • load more comments
    view more: next ›