This question pops up every now and then on social media and it always blows my mind that there are people who wipe standing up. I just don't understand the logistics of it and it seems like it would make things more difficult.

I installed a bidet during the big Covid lockdown. Now, I just do a little butt bounce and drip dry a moment. Then while sitting, just need 4 squares to pat dry.

obligatory Cyanide & Happiness comic:

Sitting down, back to front while pulling my sack out of harm’s way

i sit and wipe like anyone over the age of 8

Bidet standing up. Making it brown rain.

I wipe captain Morgan style. Standing up, with one foot up on the toilet seat. That way I can scrape up in there.

Sit for the broad strokes, stand for the detail work. One foot up on the sink when standing, not bent over forward.

My favorite place to shit is at home because that means I don't have shoes on and can slip one leg out of my pants allowing me to spread my legs more. Wiping while sitting allows you to incorporate using the seat to help keep your cheeks spread. The first wipe is a light touch so as not smash and smear but still catch any dingleberries. Second wipe is placing folded square over the hole and using a finger to work into any skin folds or creases. Continue as needed...

Additional tip. Slip one arm out of your shirt so it doesn't accidentally rub against the seat hinges or back of the lid.

Also when involving shits of the more liquid variety, don't forget to wipe your cheeks. Liquid will run down to the lowest point before dripping, and this can often be far away from the hole.

Sitting, why tf would you stand? I'm already seated and standing up is totally unnecessary.

What? Is this some kind of obesity problem?

Wait, you guys are wiping? /s

People wipe standing up?

Use a bidet. The idea sounds weird- a toilet that sprays water up your ass. I wasn't sure it was for me. Then I tried it. Holy fuck game changer. FULLY clean EVERY time.
But yeah, sitting down. Finish the dump, run the bidet, then wipe to dry, all while sitting.

You mean y'all don't use a towel on the edge of the bathtub?

Standing up I feel like I clean better, I don't understand the mechanic of doing so while sitting, I mean do you pass the TP under your balls and wipe? Or do you lift your butt a little and wipe thru the gap?

Also considering buying a bidet.

Prefer sitting down. Got me trusty rag on a stick.

Sitting down.