I mean, I have no shame in acknowledging that I too had and may still have from time to time some resentment. Maybe I'm projecting? But I do see in your writing the mindspace I recognize personally. It's part of being in a privileged position while also suffering the negative consequences of said privilege. It really is uncomfortable to be told that I'm the problem when, from my point of view, I'm trying to get rid of the problem.

But both are true, so I do think it's easier to get through this by letting go of this peeve. Yeah sure a bunch of women will say they'd rather come across a bear when hiking, some will wear t-shirts saying that all men are garbage, some misandrists will yell that all cis males need to have their dicks chopped off. But if that's what the majority of your experience of "the left" is, there's something wrong with the composition of your social life. "The left" is more than that, and in that regard it's just a fine place to be, even if it's one that will not let me forget that I still have lots of ingrained sexism - I really do, I would not pass infinitely narrow "purity tests" as you say. Same for racism, transphobia, ageism, ableism etc (which is why I said this experience is universal).