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Report: You Could Quit Job Right Now And Just Play PS5 Until You Run Out Of Money (www.theonion.com)
submitted 2 years ago by [M] to c/theonion@midwest.social
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[–] 19 points 2 years ago (4 children)

Please tell me how to make money without wage labour.

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  • [–] 9 points 2 years ago

    Easy, just be rich already!

    You know how much labor a landlord does? None! Even if you consider things like picking up checks telling people you won't fix stuff is labor there are services that will do that for you!

    Stocks? If you are rich you can stack the deck and never lose!

    Rich people literally cannot give money away fast enough to be poor.

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  • [+] -11 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    In an incredibly basic sense: buy low, sell high. As we live in a capitalist society, this is the way things work.

    Those who choose to slave away as workers are only generating profit for their overlords

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  • [–] 11 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    What do I buy low and sell high?

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  • [–] 5 points 2 years ago

    You simply need a diversified portfolio of assets, then you do shorts but don't do puts or something.

    I actually have no idea what any of that means, but I have a friend who does stocks stuff and that's the sort of thing he says lol.

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  • [–] -3 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Bananas

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  • [–] 3 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Isn't the banana market run by cartels now?

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  • [–] -3 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    I couldn't say, but avocados are a cash crop utilized by cartels

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  • [–] 3 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    So gamble? The only proven way to reliably make money on investing are things like index funds, which you will need a fair amount of starting capital to make a living off of.

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  • [–] -1 points 2 years ago

    I'm not talking about stocks. I'm talking about literally anything that people will pay money for, which is a lot of stuff. You can even make the stuff or get it for free, vastly increasing your profit margins.

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