Somehow a friend of mine was convinced to try it, and now insists on taking shots of it every night out.

At least the taglines are accurate:

Malort: turning taste-buds into taste-foes for generations!

Malort: tonight’s the night you fight your dad!

Malort: these pants aren’t going to shit themselves!

Malort: the Gary, Indiana of liquor!

At uni, the go-to liquor at our events was made from malört and we would have shots of it served up. The taste is awful and it sticks in your mouth, I hated every single one but I have never passed it up either.

The grapefruit reference is accurate. I'd describe it as floor varnish thinner mixed with hyper-concentrated grapefruit rind. The interesting thing is the way it doesn't actually smell that bad, but then it starts terrible and gets worse after a few seconds. I'm convinced there's some interesting chemistry going on in there where it degrades into other chemicals as it oxidizes in your mouth.

The only remotely comparable flavor I've ever had is...

...Unicum, which tastes like a cedar chest smells, and I was more than a little afraid would make me go blind.

0/10 for both, would absolutely recommend if you want someone to establish a baseline for "absolute worst-tasting thing ever deliberately consumed that is technically meant to be consumed."

Dumpster juice. That’s the best way I can describe it.

I am one of like less than 2% of the population that actually likes it.

To me, it just tastes like a gin that’s more…dirty? I dunno how else to describe it, but just more “dirty” pine. I actually enjoy it. 🤷‍♂️

Tasted like my grandfather’s shoes