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[–] 10 points 1 month ago (5 children)

"Avoid stress" is code for don't worry about things you have no control over.

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  • [–] 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 child)

    Where to get my next meal, is something I don't always have control over. Unfortunately it's also not something I can stop worrying about.

    Edit: made it clear that my situation is much better now, but it wasn't always.

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  • [+] -10 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    Huh? Where and what you eat is absolutely something you have control over. A war in Iran raising prices on food is not something you have control over.

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  • [–] 10 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    Oh yeah? I'm jealous you never had to worry about what job to do in the economy that will feed me. I had few months where I was going door to door, hoping someone wants their lawn mowed or windows washed so I can eat that night. And I'd say I'm privileged ones because I knew this kind man who was willing to lend me his tools to mow and to clean windows. I'm lucky because I got a scholarship for tuition for university and I don't have to worry about what to eat anymore.

    But for the few months I relied only on window washing and lawn moving, I remember I at least had 4-5 days where despite going through 100s of houses, no one needing the services. But Please tell me how absolute of a control I had about what I eat with 0 earnings in that day and my networth being essentially 0. I guess absolute control I had was starve.

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  • [–] -3 points 1 month ago

    Not trying to get into a poverty contest with you. You mistook me clarifying what I said as a challenge against your life experiences.

    To reiterate: don't stress about things you have no control over. Stressing about it won't change anything. That time and energy is better spent stressing about the things you do have control over.

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  • [–] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Thinking I have no control over things feels defeatist

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago

    Y'all have never been to court ordered alcoholics anonymous meetings and it shows.

    Reinhold Niebuhr wrote the first known version of the Serenity Prayer, and it's been through a few revisions just by popular word of mouth or even literal Hallmark greeting cards, but the version they say at AA meetings is:

    God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

    The basic principle can be decoupled from the religious origins and still be a useful approach to life. Learn not to stress about the things not in your control, while still taking control of the influence you do have.

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