When Covid hit i was 17, i'm italian and we had it pretty rough. After the lockdown i was left with anxiety problems i never suffered before. The last year of high school was like a fever dream, we would do like 2 weeks of school in person and 2 online and the rules changed constantly. Social interactions as i knew them before, in school and outside, changed and became more difficult. The fact that you lose a lot of friends due to everyone going to different cities to study for university didnt help either, i was basically alone for the first time in my life.

To cut it short, with highs and lows, i feel sometimes like i'm not supposed to deal with grown-up problems. Like i missed part of my life. I mean, when you enter high school youre basically still a kid and the years where you kinda are more mature are the exact ones i spent dealing with covid and its consequences. Could be because the first high school years were under my expectations and i counted on the last ones to give my youth a turn, and that's why i feel i got robbed but idk.

In general its like i arrived where i currently am (last years of uni, then who knows maybe i'll have to start working) too much fast. Like i speeded all my way in some of the best years of my life. Maybe its not totally because of covid but still, it feels like i found myself at a point far too close to the end of my youth (i mean the moment you still study and are much more free than when you will be working) and looking back i struggle to see how i ended up here.

Just a thought i had for some time, curious to see if everyone feel the same.

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[–] 13 points 2 months ago (2 children)

If it makes you feel any better there is a phrase that "youth is wasted on the young". You can be "youthful" for a long time afterwards. My early 20s were the same as yours (a long time before anyone had heard of covid), and I felt similar to you, but by my mid 20s I had realised that my age was only a number and I could still have a word time if I wanted and the only thing stopping me was myself. That was freeing and the years have only got better since - lots of challenges too for sure but can look back and say my early 20s were some of the worst years now. I am an anti-capitalist now though!

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  • [–] 5 points 2 months ago*

    Yep at one point I realized, hey, theres no rules except those I put on myself, and limits imposed by my environment.

    If I want to go out and play in the mud I can. If I want to stay up and watch movies I can. If I wanna go for a drive to nowhere after work I can. If I want to read more than 1 book at once, I can!

    Its actually really great when i think about it. So many others have self imposed limits ("thats kid stuff, I'm too old, its embarrassing" etc) when they could do so much more.

    To OP:

    20s aren't that great because usually, your friends are dumb, or you're dumb, and probably dont have much money. And if youre in school you have that to worry about all the time.

    Also, we are all children in adult bodies. People act grown up but its all for show. No one knows what they're doing and are just as scared as you.

    Just keep in shape and eat somewhat healthy in your 20s at least. Even 15 or 30 minutes of workouts a few times a week will save you a lot of pain! This said from someone who "made fun" of gyms and health nuts my whole life. Still do. Or find an activity to get you moving, lije biking or climbing.

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  • [–] [S] 1 point 2 months ago

    Yeah i agree. I'll just have to stamp the concept that i can have meaningful experiences even if i feel like im not in my "youth" anymore deep in my brain haha. Btw glad you got better and became anti-capitalist. we have nothing to lose but our chains! :)

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