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So apparently full stops in texts are 'passive agressive' now. What other unwritten rules for texting have changed over the last couple of decades? (lemmy.world)
submitted 7 months ago by [M] to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world
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[–] 31 points 7 months ago (6 children)

and my dad replies, “Great.” That looks passive aggressive

What about it makes it look passive aggressive? How would excluding punctuation make it not look passive aggressive?

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  • [–] 37 points 7 months ago (2 children)

    It's the explicit inclusion of period where 'normally' there wouldn't be one. In texting or DMs it would normally be assumed that one-liners wouldn't contain punctuation except to enhance effect, so the inclusion of the full stop is being read as a 😐 or exaggerated neutrality

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  • [–] 11 points 7 months ago (4 children)

    It’s the explicit inclusion of period where ‘normally’ there wouldn’t be one.

    But given the larger history of textual communication, full punctuation is normal. Texting isn't charged per character so it's not like there's a benefit to leaving it out.

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  • [–] 11 points 7 months ago

    Texting isn't charged per character anymore, and only in most places most of the time. And those habits may still persist in other places. My manner of 'speech' is very different in front of a keyboard vs on a phone, for instance.

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  • [–] 3 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    Texting used to be done with a number pad, so going as far as adding a period used to be a statement. Obviously we all have keyboards now, but I’m sure some of that still translates over to today.

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  • [–] 1 point 7 months ago (2 children)

    Leaving out unnecessary characters makes you type faster, that's also why people write u instead of you sometimes

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  • [–] 1 point 7 months ago (1 child)

    For those of us who learned to type, typing u instead of you will take longer because of muscle memory. I'm using glide typing on a phone for this and I still had to slow down to type u instead of you.

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    Well you're used to writing "you" instead of "u" while texting (for the record, I also always write "you"). Similiarly, a lot of people (namely those who grew up with phones), are used to omitting full stops at the end of a message, so if someone does it it must be a conscious decision. See where I'm going with this? (Also it's not like people who use them are immediately sounding passive-aggressive, context matters)

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  • [–] -1 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    dude/ette

    read some fukan poetry OK thanks

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  • [–] 5 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (3 children)

    If poetry text
    Is how you commune with friends
    Passive aggressive.

    edit: fixed the formatting, and my keyboard unironically took my double-tap on space to add periods for me! 😅

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    and my keyboard unironically took my double-tap on space to add periods for me!

    Markdown also permits a trailing backslash to be a linebreak, as an alternative to the two trailing spaces.

    foo\
bar

    yields

    foo
    bar

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  • [–] 1 point 7 months ago (1 child)

    Does Lemmy need the double space? This isn't Reddit after all, and it's the only Markdown implementation I've seen with that requirement for line breaks.

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  • [–] 1 point 7 months ago* (1 child)

    No, baron, I was just pointing out that there are lots of different rules depending on the medium and genre and participants. le sigh

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  • [–] 12 points 7 months ago* (1 child)

    What about it makes it look passive aggressive?

    Good question!

    As I explained later in the post, “Great.” looks like sarcasm. My brain interprets it as having a sarcastic tone, and thus being passive aggressive.

    (I am not alone in this, hence the very thing we’re commenting on.)

    How would excluding punctuation make it not look passive aggressive?

    You might as well ask why tone of voice changes the way we interpret things. Written short-form communication has evolved cultural norms that some people understand better than others, just like spoken communication. Chalk my tone interpretation up to an adolescence spent on IRC.

    My point is that the full stop being passive aggressive is contextual. None of my uses of it here are intended to portray passive aggression or sarcasm, and if I wanted to do that I would not only change my sentence length and structure, but also my vocabulary.

    But of course these norms aren’t as readily understood as actual tone of voice, which is why things like “/s” can be useful.

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  • [–] 8 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    First off, thanks for humoring me.

    As I explained later in the post, “Great.” looks like sarcasm. My brain interprets it as having a sarcastic tone, and thus being passive aggressive. (I am not alone in this, hence the very thing we’re commenting on.)

    I get that it's a common interpretation amongst a demographic.

    You might as well ask why tone of voice changes the way we interpret things

    Eh, vocal changes carry actual physical changes in the sound waves which non-hearing-impaired persons can perceive, so I don't quite think it's an apt comparison. But I understand your intent in doing so.

    But of course these norms aren’t as readily understood as actual tone of voice, which is why things like “/s” can be useful.

    Precisely why it seems odd to me to interpret the use of the basic of punctuation whose literary meaning hasn't ever carried an absence of express indicator of emotional intent to be negative.

    Again, thanks for engaging with me on it, even though I still don't get it.

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  • [–] 4 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    I think it is because short form texts like IMs/SMS/irc are more like spoken language than written language. And if somebody talks to you and ends a sentence with "period", the meaning/feeling of the sentence changes.

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  • [–] 3 points 7 months ago* (1 child)

    In my mind, the full stop "sounds" like dropping the voice at the end, like you do at the end of a sentence.
    And in speech, dropping the voice at the end of "Great" would sound sarcastic.

    Whereas an exclamation mark "sounds" high-pitched and excited.

    And no punctuation is so normal in text that my mind "adds" the expected sign at the end, which after "Great" would be an exclamation mark.

    It's really hard to explain, I hope I'm making sense.

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  • [–] 3 points 7 months ago

    I would be far more likely to interpret someone I didn't know who texted great without a period to be sarcastic.

    It seems like deviation from their normal pattern would have some meaning, but without context all of these could be read as sarcastic depending on what kind of reaction someone might be expecting.

    great

    great.

    great!

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