Yes. They still suck because I hate tomato flavor and texture. The only way I tolerate it is in things like Bolognese, but there's enough other flavor to override the core tomato flavor.

On another note, I would really appreciate if my saying "I dislike A" was just once not met with the attitude of "surely you just haven't done A right".

Like, I'm not even saying don't say what you were going to. Just... Don't insist it's my fault? You could've just said, "that sucks, but I found that with tomatoes quality makes a huge difference - maybe if you can get your hands on high-quality ones it's worth trying again" and it would just feel so much different.

Sorry for going off on you a little, I'm sure there was no I'll intent on your side, but it's reactions like yours that always make me very hesitant to even talk about food with new people. Which is kinda sad, because food can be a very awesome topic of conversation.

Not trying to rain on your parade, but I have yet to find anything positive about tomatoes at all 😅 they taste bad, have this really gross skin that weirds me out texture-wise, and inside is full of glibber.

That being said, in general your advice is sound - I can't eat shrimp because of the texture, but I love the flavor. Ground small enough so I don't have to feel it against my teethe when chewing and I'm a happy camper!

I'm lucky enough that I can get myself to try almost everything at least once - but if I don't like it after that I will refuse to eat it without remorse. I think the second part for me made trying more stuff easier, because the trying was my way to give myself permission not to like it?

Only thing I really couldn't bring myself to try is chicken feet. I was a bit disappointed since lots of people were raving about it, but still - I genuinely tried. That's enough for me!

For me having an official diagnosis first gave me words to research what was wrong with me since I had no clue.

Second, after thorough research it made me give myself permission to work with me and not against me - I wasn't lazy or anything, I just genuinely was disabled. Having a diagnosis was my shield when someone called me that, and it was so fucking necessary as a late-diagnosef woman. Especially when it came to family to get them off my back.

In my case no medication, but the internal permission to cut myself some slack and figure out in what weird ways my brain works.

Edit: that was supposed to be a reply to someone - it's been a long day 😅 @Agent641@lemmy.world

You're quite new to the internet aren't you? There's tons of people trashing artwork made in Photoshop. Earlier today I saw a comic and everyone complained about how it shouldn't have been made.

Not liking art is common on the internet. The difference between ai generated and human-created is that humans usually have an intention when they create. AI just... Creates.

In this case my interest was piqued why the subject matter, because it seemed to promise an interesting story. More interesting than memes are usually the stories behind the pictures used, and they often come from very different places.

This one had nothing. And that's why the interest vanished. Not because it was AI or because I want to deny I had a feeling at first - simply because my expectations for a good story were disappointed.

Do with this what you want, if you want to keep trying to twist this into AI hate, you do you - I've explained myself and I'm not going to reply again :)

It was interesting... Not as a picture, but because the stuff depicted is so unusual. What was the story behind it?

...turns out there's none. It's just AI-generated. Very few pictures are interesting/awe-inducing as a picture, most of them fascinate because of the story they present a glimpse of. For me that's the heart of pictures. And AI pictures are missing that.

So yeah, knowing it's AI-generated instantly makes me uninterested in the vast majority of cases.

If you measure empathy by understanding other people, I'm a lot closer to 1 than to 100. But if you measure empathy as "feels the vibe of the room, but has no clue if they caused it or someone is angry and doesn't know how to react if they had the knowledge anyway" then I'm above 90, probably.

I'm not saying you're assessment of yourself is wrong - I obviously don't know you. But I'm saying that just because you don't understand why people are upset doesn't necessarily mean you are not empathetic. It was a huge revelation for me when I got that.

I'm not sure if what you describe is really an inability to get the big picture or the lack of available information to really base decisions on.

For me it's hard to make that kind of decisions because other people can't plan well and their estimates are notoriously wrong and forget to take into account a lot of things.

But what I'm really good at it seeing the bigger picture in the sense of knowing the interdependences between things. If I see a requirement I don't just follow it point by point. I think about what how it fits into the whole and where things can go wrong and ask if people have considered that. (90% of time the answer is no)

So I consider seeing the big picture and the details my strength, but like you I struggle to plan ahead long-term or estimate things because I don't feel confident with the amount of information available to make such guesses.

I was thinking of getting my next desktop from them. Can you elaborate?

Seven in German handwriting has an additional line.

Not gonna lie, you sound as if you think controlling parents are in the right, the way you say they should have access.

That's a resounding fuck no from me.

It doesn't matter if kids fuck up or not. If they do, like your son, they hopefully learn a valuable lesson that apparently they have been spared before, for whatever reason. Maybe they never really had to put effort in studying in high school before - I saw a lot of that in my friends at college, they completely underestimated that college is harder than high school.

Or maybe they never learned to get shit done without parents nagging. Especially in that case they need to learn, for you will not always be there to nag. Helicopter parenting is a sign of lacking confidence in your kid's abilities. And even if the kids are fucking up, mistakes must be made in order to learn.

It's not your life, but your kids life, and your kid needs to live it. Let them. Support them if you can and they need help, but don't enable them - if they keep fucking up, let them unfuck it themselves are the third time. Otherwise you'll do your kid a disservice and make them unable to deal with life.

And I'm not saying don't help them if they ask for help, like when they can't figure something out on their own. Help them help themselves as much as possible and try not to fix everything for them.

You controlling the grades is trying to fix it for your son. How will he ever get work done later on his own? Many neurodivergent people don't do well in-office or in a job setting in general. In a home office setting or if you are your own boss the skill to self-motivate is even more important.

🥲

Yes. My younger sister was always objectively better than I had been, and while my family was not as blatant as yours (seriously! What they do to you almost amounts to abuse if you ask me!) they subtly acted similar. Not expecting me to do well on my own, I was never fast or good enough... Yep, been there.

However! I've grown up and found my way, and my sister and I are closer than ever. She, too, hated this dynamic. And she told me that actually it was me who enabled her. You see, when I learned something new I was excited and got home and talked about. And she listened and learned. She has a better talent for math and numbers, but in the end when she learned something in school she basically already knew it because I taught her.

And I hated going to places alone, so once when I was in tenth grade I dragged my seventh grade sister to a film club for English movies. The teacher said he didn't think she can keep up but she was welcome to try - and she did. She told me years later that for her there were no limits because of age or assumed ability. I asked, she was allowed to try, and she innocently just picked things up. She said this for her drove home the point of "doesn't hurt to ask" and that this opened so many doors for her.

Objectively she is still "better" than I am. Very successful with a straight career, earns more too. But that's not important. We're still learning from each other and together, and we do our best to lift each other up. And she knows what it's like to grow up in a toxic family, so she gets me.

I guess my point is that life is not a competition. And the "problem" in your situation is not you nor your abilities. It's your parents favoritism and sabotaging and disparaging you. You are not your sister. And that's normal and great. You're different people with different strengths and different ambitions. You will find your way. No matter if it's writing or something else. Don't put that much stock in what you're parents say and demand.

A good GPA doesn't guarantee a good job or a good life. What counts is if you like your life, because you have to live through it.