I think it's easy to point how this is pretty off in some ways, but if you think of it as being aimed at someone with no coffee knowledge, I think it's not a bad overview of how that person is likely to experience those types of drinks.

If I ask for a latte, and you give me a coffee with milk, I’m gonna be upset. There’s a big difference between steamed milk and just milk.

Half of this are wrong though

Hmm, I don't think I'd want to buy coffee from this place

I know everyone is here for the same thing, and we've all been correcting this image since it showed up five years ago, but an Americano is not a black coffee.

It is however, coffee that is black, but if I ordered one and got the other, I'd know somethings up.

Also, I really don't know why people drink americano. To me they just taste like cigarettes, but I'm currently drinking chicory so my opinion is moot.

Tea Soup

caramalized onions warm onions

bread flour with water

For anyone that sees espresso and thinks express, as in something fast, it's actually meant to be pressed, as it's an Italian term. So that's hot water that went through pressed coffee powder.

I prefer the Spanish names.

Americano - half coffee half water.
Solo - just coffee.
Cortado - coffee with a "cut" of milk.
Cafe con leche - half coffee half milk.
Leche manchada - milk "dirtied" with a dash of coffee.

Then expresso and all the other bullshit.

For all you coffee snobs hear me this!

Affogato!
Get a scoop of vanilla ice cream. Pour a shot of espresso over it. Heaven!!

https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1022454-affogato

But an espresso is strong coffee and not neccessarily miniature...

This is gonna make a lot of Europeans mad.

Source : am french. I love me some Americano, but the default here is the espresso. You can also get a "long espresso" which is basically a diluted espresso, and is still not the same as an Americano (and this is where my coffee knowledge stops, so I'm not sure what the differences are exactly). I also have some Italian family and they would probably disown me if I said that the Americano is the "default" black coffee

I thought flat white and latte were synonyms and they both meant milky coffee. Now I'm confused, so it's just the foam?

If I order an Americano and you serve me a filter black coffee, I swear ...

caffeine in suppository form ass coffee

Espresso concentrated coffee

Quality shitpost.