My chest hair isn't glorious enough.

HR

Local authorities.

I can't get my leg over the back of a chair.

The fact they don't sell clothing like this.

A sense of fashion and social expectations. The recognition and acknowledgement that the true 80's are gone.

Because I live in the part of the world where I would get frost bite for six months of the year if I exposed my skin .... and the other six months of being eaten alive by mosquitoes and insects if I exposed my skin.

I'm Indigenous and there's a reason why my face and hands are tanned and the rest of my body is white as any sun starved Scandinavian.

I just don’t have that Riker swag.

My obesity

I'm not Riker.

Self-respect. Either too much or too little, take your pick.

Cultural norms, in part, but mostly? Because I’d look [more] terrible.

My nipple would get chilly

Shame

Out of respect for everyone else's sanity.

My wife

Not being ruled by dominant women. (🤤)

Work policy

Gotta save some wonders for the future.

If you dress like that and got that amount of swagger, you're not getting anything done. There's gonna be various holes with various levels of suction attempting to attach to you all the live long day.

I got shit to do and am not ready for that lifestyle.

Looks like it would slip off my shoulder

I’m from the 20th century and clothes this cool haven't been available yet.

Moobs.

nudism

Self awareness

Tape. That thing only stays open with tape.

Gumption

I have that chest hair but the pasty pudgy skin does not show it off like Riker

Honestly though. I love the variety of clothing available for people who identify as women. It makes me sad that Americans who identify as men don't have anything near that variety or glamour

winter

I'm a teacher.

My beard.

Blue isnt my color

I'd get irritated if it slid off of either shoulder

Otherwise yeah fuck it hook me up

I'm good with a t shirt and jeans thanks