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Forest Gump thought "life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get" because he was illiterate and couldn't read the little card. (lemmy.ca)
submitted 2 years ago by to c/showerthoughts@lemmy.world
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(I have no idea if accurate.)

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[–] 74 points 2 years ago (1 child)

Police are like a box of chocolates

They’ll kill your dog.

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  • [+] -27 points 2 years ago (5 children)

    I don't know what I expected. Nothing can just be fun anymore.

    I come into a comments section to read and maybe find something interesting and we have police brutality jokes, political bullshit, mean comments.

    It confuses me that people are thinking about this stuff all the time and trying to jam their misery into everything.

    Downvote me, up vote me, I don't care but I am just so tired of being forced to think about all the bullshit in the world every day all at once. It's inescapable.

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  • [–] 15 points 2 years ago*

    Dude, there are thousands of people on this application every day. Someone is going to be thinking of something relevant to what's going on in the world at all times. Not everyone is thinking that all the time, but odds are someone is. Just like it's almost certain you won't win the lottery, but it's almost certain someone will. Lots of events happening all the time means even unlikely things are likely to happen.

    Also, this was pretty funny. Comedy almost always has a political element to it. If you Rent saying anything meaningful or impactful, why say it at all, right?

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago

    Ooooh noeee, poor wittle guy. He's annoying that people correctly point out THE INSANE LEVEL OF MISERY MOST PEOPLE LIVE UNDER. How could you survive knowing that lots of people got actually murdered and thus can't survive.

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    • [+] 56 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)
    [deleted]
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  • [–] 18 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    I've always seen literal maps showing what's what. Sounds like maybe none of the Gumps could read. But even so, wouldn't you learn to tell the shapes apart? It shouldn't keep surprising you over and over.

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  • [+] 27 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)
    [deleted]
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  • [+] [S] -6 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    ... So you're upset that I said card instead of map? Really? Whatever. Round here it's a little card.

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  • [+] 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)
    [deleted]
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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    You've always had the iconic Whitman's sampler, haven't you?

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    • [–] 52 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    I'm not sure he was illiterate but he did play football at Alabama so it's a distinct possibility.

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    • [–] 36 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Back in the day there wasn't maps when you got chocolate. Food allergies were not much of a concern back then and nutrition information wasn't required.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago

    More to the point, the boxes weren't all the same. Sure, they only had ~10-20 different pieces, but they would be placed seemingly at random. You may (or may not) have had a card to identify them, but that wasn't tied to location.

    It also doesn't cover the quantities. Does this box have 5 cherry cordials or just 1? What about honeycomb? Opera cream? Peanut butter?

    You still see this from some of the smaller chocolatiers.

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    • [–] 21 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Most boxes of chocolate didn't have a card or map explaining which was which back in the 90s.

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  • [–] 4 points 2 years ago

    There was always a risky box of chocolates on grandma's kitchen table.

    Each bite was a gamble: might be a delicious milk chocolate with a peanut inside, or it might be a bitter chocolate with some medicine-like cherry filling.

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    • [–] 19 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    I've bought plenty of local chocolate shop boxes that didn't have a map.

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    • [–] 17 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    He wasn’t illiterate though. His character was just rather simple, and wholesome. I never thought his character was stupid, just perhaps autistic.

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    • [–] 7 points 2 years ago

    He is literate, it just took him longer to fully learn to be than most folks.

    I think his mama was talking about how Boxes of chocolates were often sent to folks as a surprise, meaning they wouldn't know what's inside from being the ones to buy them originally.

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    [–] 4 points 2 years ago

    Well, I thought it was cute.

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    [–] 2 points 2 years ago

    Even if you can read, it’s mostly just cheap praline.

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    [–] 2 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

    Cops are like a box of chocolates: they'll kill your dog.

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