All things that are illegal in real countries

Based on the font of "Company Policies" and the fact that it's an embossed metal (or shiny plastic) sign, I'm gonna assume this is a gag decoration. However, I wouldn't be surprised about a company using this as inspiration...

Isn't this just standard US employment terms?

What you're saying is, that you'll only accept that I'm sick if you genuinely hear absolutely nothing from me because I'm either dead or completely incapacitated, and then only show up later after recovering?

I can work with that.

"No one wants to work anymore"

Sounds like someone has wasted their generational wealth and is getting desperate.

I have to hope that this is a joke sign.

I see this and assume it's fake. Then, my wife starts a job where they make her pay for her own background heck and drug test and tell her she will be charged $250 if she quits without a 2 week notice. How is any of that legal?!

Smoke breaks: smoking will happen during your shift and you will ash your cigs into the fabric scrap bins.

Thank you, Triangle Shirtwaist Factory Management

Once thing is true though, when I'm sick I'm too weak to go the doctor. That shouldn't be a requirement

Would that be legal in the US?

If I saw this I would either quit on the spot or call up my union.

And companies wonder why 'people don't wanna work anymore.....'

Treating them like this isn't helping their case any.

Oh damn looks like I got the Two week flu. The phone doctor said the only cure is foreign beach air. Don't worry though, I'm hating every minute of it and I'll be back just as soon as I'm well again.

104 vacation days

fine print: We reserve the right to force you to come in without additional pay if there is work to do.

“Sorry I haven’t been to work this month, I’m too sick to go to the doctor”

The "Thank you management should be read with the intonation of "THANKS OBAMA!"

Thats depressing

America be like…

So anyways, I started re-telling Grimms Fairy tales to my boss at work..

I'd work there part time to troll management until I piss them off so much I get fired.

Would not give my money to a POS pig business like this