The man that sleeps with a machete is also a crack shot with a dildo. Be warned.

When you sleep near Clarkson and Hammond you learn to arm yourself

You hope it's only one night.

#wordstoliveby

Or drives with a machete https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUszbhcM-j0

I saw a homeless woman that would sleep with a machete in her boot. I thought it was smart cuz people will try to go through their pockets while they sleep, but not hers.

Which one?

Randy Quaid!?