They see women as accessories, like a tie or jacket, and fundamentally less valuable than themselves.

I think this is partly driven by a mixture of misogyny and low self-esteem. A woman on equal footing might threaten their very fragile self worth.

So being a normal person would mean partial submission to a woman (because that's just part of being in a relationship, you're not always on top), but at the same time they feel the societal need for a woman, because only having sex makes them true men.

And it's also the typical self-victimization of fascist Ideologies. Nazis are victims of the Jews, current fascists are victims of immigrants or Muslims, incels are victims of Chad Thundercock.