As luck would have it, though, when pizza is on a bagel, you can have pizza anytime. So, ya know, at least they won't starve... They'll just be incredibly malnourished as a result of their structurally imposed dietary restrictions.

I think that's just the perspective and cropping of the picture. It looks like the nearest pillar is in the same row of tile as the further pillar, so there are three rows of tiles between the oven and the pillar.

Nah those look like 30cm tiles given that fridges and ovens have pretty standard widths and assuming the 2 poles are in line you would have about 75cm or 2 and a half feet from the front of the oven.

I mean its cramped but its usable.