Ask Lemmy

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[–] Pronell@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago (1 child)

Right, but that's my point - be the change you wish to see in the world.

The people you think of as popular who are complimenting people, maybe they're only popular because they make other people feel good by acknowledging them.

Be kind. Be encouraging. Be complimentary. There's no good reason not to be, really.

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[–] Kilnier@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 years ago (1 child)

Listen to this guy. I’ve lived the shift he’s prompting you take.

It’s incredibly hard to describe. People start to see it on you I think.

From my experience it seems to be in the way I look at people differently and how my body language has shifted. I’m face-blind so it’s hard for me to say for sure but I think people can see that I’m looking for positivity and a way to compliment them or brighten their day.

And if you’re trying to get laid… Holy shit. Give a genuine thank you and compliment someone of the same sex on your dates. Show your romance for the world and not just the person across the table. It really really works.

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[–] Pronell@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago (1 child)

Yup. I got a promotion at work a year ago and in my interview for team lead I said I wanted to emulate an earlier person in my role who made people feel supported... and I know my team has respected and embraced my approach to the role.

So now I get to work each day knowing I'm respected and appreciated... that my words and actions have impact on them and their work.

Capitalism sucks, work sucks, but if it's still inevitable at least it's more bearable, you know?

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[–] Kilnier@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 years ago

Lmao exactly.

I work at a lumber mill and made the GM cry in the break room one day. All I said was ‘I see you man’ after talking about the stress he takes on.

He’s a very different person with me now.

‘Compassionate Masculinity’ is how I described one of my managers at the Apple Store. He taught me a lot through his example.

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[–] Kilnier@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 years ago

I understand this concern. It has been a strange shift but honestly it’s wonderful. That ethereal feeling doesn’t necessarily go away but it does change a bit.

As you get better at giving compliments and lifting people up you will draw similar people to you and teach people around you to speak to you in a similar way. There’s a feedback loop that raises that ethereal feeling to something more familiar but no less effecting.