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Do you ever despair at the apparent lack of regard for the "social contract" by so many? (lemmy.world)
submitted 3 years ago by to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world
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In this case, I'm referring to the notion that we all make minor sacrifices in our daily interactions in service of a "greater good" for everyone.

"Following the rules" would be a simplified version of what I'm talking about, I suppose. But also keeping an awareness/attitude about "How will my choices affect the people around me in this moment? "Common courtesy", "situational awareness", etc...

I don't know that it's a "new" phenomenon by any means, I just seem to have an increasing (subjective) awareness of it's decline of late.

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[–] 27 points 3 years ago (4 children)

My spouse and I talk about this often. A very obvious example is how rude (and recklessly dangerous) people are while driving. And myriad minor things out in public in general. No sense of community and a complete lack of consideration for others is the new normal. It got worse during and after the pandemic.

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  • [–] 9 points 3 years ago

    It really has gotten worse since the pandemic, and I see it retry much every time I’m out. Earlier today I was out walking with my dog and kid. At one point we needed to cross the street at a four way stop. However, three cars in a row didn’t even slow down for their stop sign. It’s dangerous out there

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  • [–] 4 points 3 years ago

    Big time on the pandemic front! I made the insane move to travel to Norway during the pandemic and (being a born-and-raised Idahoan) I was SHOCKED and delighted to see 99% of people there wearing their masks at all time. The sense of community is so powerfully present there, it was a big wakeup call, seeing just how shitty people are to each other here.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 years ago*

    I think people really only started noticing it during and after the pandemic.

    I have always hated people's lack of consideration. I have always been very aware of it and it has always stayed the same (at least since the 27 years I am here).

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  • [–] [S] 0 points 3 years ago (5 children)

    Yes, driving, parking--all manner of auto-related behavior are prime examples of this. But I would add that pedestrians are not faultless. Can't count the number of times I've had to wait for a young, healthy pedestrian just taking. their. time. in the crosswalk while a bunch of us are waiting to complete a turn, for example. I always double-time it in a crosswalk--it's not only courteous--it diminishes the likelihood of me getting run down by someone looking at their phone while they're driving.

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  • [–] 7 points 3 years ago (3 children)

    I hear you but is really that big of a deal? Out of all the many challenges in life, slow pedestrians affects maybe like 15-25 seconds of my day at most lol. Who cares if they trot or stroll?

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  • [–] 7 points 3 years ago*

    This is the whole point of the post. Everyone should have an intrinsic desire to get out of each other's way, be courteous, be thoughtful of other's time, etc. The flip side is we ask our neighbors to be patient as we do our best in our day, and may have things slowing US down.

    So the 1-2 punch is: be courteous to avoid bothering others, and be patient to understand that others are trying their best.

    If everyone genuinely tries on both those topics, everyone feels pretty good about their public interactions.

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  • [–] 4 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    When you work at a college you'd be amazed at how much time that takes up. Or kids just darting into the middle of a four way stop intersection on skateboards, or skating down the yellow line in the middle of the road. Or stepping out in front of a car without looking because they're heads are bent down looking at their phones (which also happens when they almost walk right into you on campus). Or the people who rev their engines and drive as fast as possible through parking garages to see how many car alarms they can set off. I saw that twice just last semester. Or every single day dodging the people who drive on the wrong side of the road in parking lots and garages because apparently they really need those lines to tell them what side to be on. Living in a major city is even worse. And it doesn't matter if the person deliberately runs out in front of you, it'll be your fault because you're the one in the car. At least in my state. Yeah, I'd say pedestrians are a great example.

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  • [–] [S] 3 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    In a larger sense, you're right of course--but it's another one of the "death by a thousand cuts" that I encounter every day...

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  • [–] -1 points 3 years ago

    Have you considered that it feels like this because of how you look at it? I used to feel like you do, aggravated at something that shouldn't be aggravating. It took a lot to realize that these little things are just that. Little.

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  • [–] 2 points 3 years ago

    I can’t say I e ever been impatient at someone crossing the street. Unless they were purposely being spiteful, they should be able to go at their own speed. Then again, my street has a lot of elderly, so I know they can’t always speed walk

    Actually, one of my most embarrassing cringe moments …. A jackass van driver parked diagonally across our street , blocking the whole thing. I imagine he thought it was a quiet street and he could get the van door slightly closer for his pickup. Effing rude as hell and there was no reason for it. So I was pissed off and using my horn to try to get him to move his effing vehicle ….,until I saw him go to the house and try to rush the disabled person he was picking up. Now I look like the asshole. Although I have to say he never did that again

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  • [–] 2 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    I'm sorry, but when I'm walking 2 miles to the nearest store, I'll adopt a steady pace. When it's my turn to go at the intersection, I'll take the time I need to go through.

    All these impatient drivers are sitting in their air-conditioned car anyway, I'm not breaking a sweat just so they can save a few seconds.

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  • [–] 0 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    So what you're saying is that you don't care about others people's time or convenience. Which then raises the question, why should others care about yours?

    This attitude is the breakdown of the social contract being discussed right now lol

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  • [–] 4 points 3 years ago

    I guess it could be construed that way, but there's a fairness element to it, too. I have waited for my turn, I'd like my time to be respected, especially by people who will be less inconvenienced than me. They will most likely make it to their destination way before me, too... Which only makes their impatience more frustrating.

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