I want to be a recreational pilot. I'm quite good at it, very committed to and interested in the procedural aspects of it, and religiously adhere to the safety guidelines. According to FAA rules you cannot have an ADHD diagnosis and be prescribed drugs for it and fly, point blank. I've never been officially diagnosed with ADHD, but the FAA reached out and grounded me because I didn't lie on the medical application and said I'd dealt with depression in the past. Despite the medical examiner clearing me and issuing my certification.

The long, tedious process of trying to be cleared again stressed me out more than flying was fun, and now I'm just sort of in a limbo, after thousands of dollars spent on training.

This is all to say that the process taught me that the stigma around mental illness is alive and well in the USA, and I just don't want any of it on my medical record anymore. I can deal with it. Mental health support isn't good enough yet to actually significantly improve my life, or at least it's never worked well enough for me. So the consequences of having any hint on an official document somewhere of not being 100% mentally stable and content 100% of the time aren't worth it. Who knows if a new opportunity or new-found passion comes along and I get fucked out of it because I felt sad for a long time and wanted to talk to someone about it, or I wanted some help trying to make my brain work more like everyone else's. I'll do what I should've done from the start, and suck it up.

Sorry for the rant, definitely more than you were looking for, it's just been weighing on me.