Am now 37, and finally getting to the point I should accept it.
That's the neat thing, you don't.
You deserve to speak your mind. The idea you must endure abuse from even those who created you is false. Don't ask "how do I cope", ask "how do I assert". There is a difference between rightful treatment from those you owe yourself to versus treatment from those people which run counterintuitive to being able to claim parenthood as justification.
What's going to happen if your children one day ask why he treats you this way? Is this good for them?