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How much pressure have you had to have kids? (piefed.cdn.blahaj.zone)
submitted 6 days ago by [M] to c/womensstuff@piefed.blahaj.zone
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[–] 4 points 6 days ago (3 children)

Please respect other people's choices here. I understand that it can be frustrating to be pressured to have children, but people that have chosen to have children are still in this community.

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  • [–] 8 points 6 days ago (1 child)

    I have children... I had to think about it very seriously and it had nothing to do with pressure from elsewhere. I also didn't insult anyone who had children. You may be taking this comment a bit too personally.

    There is absolutely pressure to have children in order to feed the machine. And there isn't much realism about whether it's a good idea. Family planning is actively discouraged by the billionaire class and by extension, society. You're so easily offended that you completely missed the point and the point is pretty important.

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  • [–] 1 point 6 days ago* (2 children)

    feed the people crushing machine that eats people and creates more money for billionaires.

    This is a rather negative view on having children and I see it often in toxic childfree communities. That's what made me say something.

    Just a polite request to be aware of and respect other people's choices.

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  • [–] 7 points 6 days ago (1 child)

    I did not disrespect anyone's choices anywhere in this post. Polite request not to project your own insecurities onto me.

    If you are confident in your choice you have children then you should be able to acknowledge reality. Having children does not change the actual state of society. I believe it's very important to me honest with my family.

    Why have children if you don't want to make the world better for them? How can the world get better if you ignore reality because it's emotionally inconvenient? Children deserve to be trusted. If they're not treated like they're capable humans they won't ever mature. I try to focus on the positive with my kids but I'll be damned if I'm going to lie to them just because the truth is unpleasant. They will be prepared to live in the world and change it for the better.

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  • [–] 2 points 6 days ago* (2 children)

    Look, I’m not attacking you or saying that we shouldn’t make a better world for our kids.

    That phrase that children are made to be consumed by the people crushing machine and billionaires is often used to criticize people who have chosen to have children in this modern world we are living in. It’s shame based language.

    That’s the only thing I was pointing out.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 days ago (1 child)

    I think you are misunderstanding when people use phrasing like that. It's not an attack on having children. It's an attack on the system and how it treats people.

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  • [–] 2 points 6 days ago

    Respectfully, I know what I’ve seen and this phrase has absolutely been used to criticize parents for deciding to have children now, particularly in the US. And especially in toxic childfree groups.

    It is used in other ways, such as criticizing capitalism, as well.

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  • [–] 2 points 6 days ago (1 child)

    Ok I agree that that's sometimes used to criticize parents but I did not do that. It comes across like you're intolerant of people talking about the issues with capitalism or you're overly sensitive and protecting intent where it doesn't exist. It's a bit unfair

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  • [–] 1 point 6 days ago

    You’re welcome to ignore my suggestion if you’d like and I promise I won’t be fussed. It was a suggestion and that’s it. I feel like I’ve been pretty polite on top of that. Let’s leave it, yeah?

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  • [–] 5 points 5 days ago (1 child)

    I misunderstood the comment you're replying to, too, at first. They're saying the government doesn't want people to think carefully about having kids, because the government wants to use kids as workers.

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  • [–] 1 point 5 days ago (1 child)

    Right and that view has been used to criticize parents for having children that the government can then use as workers. That if people stopped having children, it would help the resistance or whatever because we aren’t doing what the government wants.

    We’re starting to veer into politics with this so I don’t want to go into it too much, but that’s all I was pointing out.

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  • [–] 1 point 5 days ago (1 child)

    I wouldn't say that being childfree is an act of resistance. But the decision to have kids is a political one, and you have to think about how politics are gonna affect your kid. Elon Musk wants us to have tons of kids so that labour will be cheap and he can exploit workers. And that's what we're subjecting our kids to, if we give birth. I think adopting is a much better choice, because you can give a kid who needs help a good home, instead of creating a new life to be exploited by the bourgeoisie.

    I adopted two wonderful trans pups who have are legally adults, but still have some growing up to do because of bad parents. And I think that's the woke thing to do, compared with creating a whole new life from scratch. I wouldn't be able to sit with the ethical ramifications of doing that, what with all the problems future generations have to solve. My parents and their parents before them didn't bother to try to help the world, they just dumped all this climate change and fascism stuff on My generation. I'm not gonna do the same thing to My kids. I want to create solutions for My kids, not problems. We're gonna fight the Bourgeoisie together!

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  • [–] 1 point 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 child)

    This is exactly what I was talking about.

    It’s not immoral to have children biologically.

    Let’s be respectful about everyone’s chosen life path here please.

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  • [–] 1 point 5 days ago

    If you're in a situation where you can guarantee a good life for your kids, that's great. Personally, I'm poor and disabled, and I don't have all that much to give to a kid materially. I can't afford to give a kid a safe place to live and all the stuff they need for school. But I can make life better for two young people who already got dealt a bad hand by life and by the irresponsible people who decided to make them. I don't know you and I can't judge you. But I'll judge the hell out of My parents, My grandparents, and the biological parents of My kids. Because all of those people didn't think about the political situation they were putting their kids into. And they didn't suffer the consequences of their decisions, we did.

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