Preach sister

It's one thing to have someone online say they care about you and intellectually accept it and another to have someone casually hold on and make you feel ok

I hate balancing the mental equation of "how much do I hurt now vs how much could I hurt really trying to find someone and failing" and wondering if I'm even really capable of accepting affection

Being torn by desperately not wanting to hurt people and being terrified they'll like me more than I like them while simultaneously being way too attached to anyone who shows me affection

Knowing odds are very good the more someone gets to know me the less they'll like me

Knowing that if I miraculously find someone I'm compatible with I just don't have the energy to put into a relationship to make it work

Personally, I'm done trying. I know you'll get there though, you have an incrediblely tenacious spirit, of my chats with you are anything to go by