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[–] 18 points 2 years ago

I live next to one in Texas. On numerous occasions a very exasperated young lady has pounded on my door asking if I'd seen an old man wandering about.

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  • [–] 10 points 2 years ago

    This is precisely how my grandfather died. The VA knew he had severe dementia but weren't paying attention and he wandered away and ended up passing away. My family sued the VA, not for money, but for them to tighten up their rules about dealing with veterans with dementia. We won, although I've never followed up to see if there was any significant impact from the rule changes.

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  • [–] 10 points 2 years ago

    Ah, the 'leave the elders on the ice floe' method of senior care.

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  • [–] 10 points 2 years ago* (2 children)

    Honest question, why are people so obsessed with living? I’d want to be euthanized at the first sign of dementia. Just give me like a week to get my affairs in order. It’s bizarre that people would rather exist as mindless husks than die peacefully at a time of their choosing.

    Maybe it’s fear. Most humans live and think like animals whose impulse to survive overrides rationality. Or is there another explanation?

    I genuinely want to understand.

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  • [–] 8 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    I cannot speak for anyone else, but I am an atheist and I do not believe in an afterlife, so I want every single second of life on this planet I can possibly get. I have had a lot of bad things in my life, including ongoing serious health problems. I have been to 10 on the pain scale multiple times. Dementia doesn't scare me. I understand why some people don't want to go out that way because it was the way my father went out, but he went out angry because he was an angry man and eventually didn't even know why he was angry. I certainly understand why Robin Williams chose to end his life because his mind was his gift to the world.

    But I'm not like that. I want to be alive as long as I still know what life is.

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  • [+] 0 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 child)
  • [–] 3 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    How do you define a life not worth living? Because I lost the genetic lottery in huge ways-

    Does that mean reaching 10 on the pain scale every day for a few years due to a rare nerve disorder? Me.

    Does that mean not having any solid food apart from a couple of bites with my mouth completely numbed since last August? Also me.

    On top of that, I have type II bipolar disorder and no job.

    A lot of people would say that life is not living, especially when it's this nerve disorder.

    But I would say it is.

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)

    I defer to you on whether your particular life was worth living. The question is why you would want to live if your mind, your character and memories were gone — if you were a burden on those around you and could no longer engage in self-reflection or abstract reasoning. What would be the point?

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Because that isn't what dementia necessarily is. My father recognized me when he was down to doing child-level jigsaw puzzles and even though he had a much more primitive mind, he was still him in essence, that wasn't gone. Not everything goes in every case.

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 child)

    Dementia is a spectrum of neuropathology, so you’ve effectively ignored my question. But ok, let’s go with your specific example. Why would you keep your father alive in such an undignified state? You’re describing him as playing with “child-level jigsaw puzzles,” meaning he's barely sentient and someone has to wipe his ass, which is a horrifying indignity. Literally my idea of hell. Are you punishing him? Are you punishing yourself?

    Humans are supposed to transcend the mortal realm, so why this obsession with remaining alive even at the expense of everyone around you? I guess I’ll never get an answer.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Would I keep my father alive? No, because he's not me. I thought we were talking about what I would do with my own life.

    And I gave you my answer- I don't believe in an afterlife, so I don't want to end my life unless it has to end. It's not that you'll never get an answer, it's that you don't like the answer you were given.

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)

    And I gave you my answer- I don't believe in an afterlife, so I don't want to end my life unless it has to end.

    WHY? That’s what I’m asking you. You haven’t even attempted to answer this question.

    You don’t like the answer

    You haven’t given an answer, and my guess is you don’t have one. Perhaps the reason you would want to live, even with dementia, is a mystery to you. That’s fine, but just say so.

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

    Because I enjoy living. I'm not sure why that needs to be made clear to you.

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  • [+] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)
  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

    Yes, again, there is not one type of dementia. Why are you assuming I would only have the kind of dementia where I wasn't aware I was alive?

    And no I wouldn't be a burden, I'd be in a nursing home as I have already told my family in the event of dementia.

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  • [+] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)
  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

    I presume you've heard of insurance.

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)

    Here’s how your answer sounds to me:

    “I would rather pay hundreds of thousands of dollars to waste people’s time wiping my ass long after I’ve lost my mind than help future generations and my loved ones by passing away at a moment of my choosing.”

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

    So you haven't heard of insurance?

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  • [+] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)
  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

    Ah, I see. Kill myself when I'm old to help the economy.

    I think I've heard of that somewhere before...

    https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/texas-lt-gov-dan-patrick-suggests-he-other-seniors-willing-n1167341

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  • [+] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)
  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

    Do explain how my wife and I not paying a small amount a month toward long-term care insurance will help save the rainforest. This should be interesting.

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  • [+] 1 point 2 years ago* (2 children)
  • [–] 0 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Yes, I have dementia because you think my wife and I not spending about $1000 a year on long-term care insurance would make a major impact in the world.

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  • [–] 0 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Look, I get that you really want me to commit suicide, but it isn't going to happen.

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  • [+] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)
  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

    Insulting me is also not going to get me to commit suicide, sorry.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago

    What is this news format with the headline as an image macro in meme format. That's genius.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago

    Lmao, why am I not surprised that when I see someplace I grew up around in the news, it's only for bad reasons? Still sad tho, tbh

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago (2 children)

    Why don’t they have cameras on every door that sends an alert and a video of who is going in and out? This seems like a solved problem. They can even do facial recognition on some of them.

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  • [–] [S] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

    Probably a workers’ rights issue there. Do you want your employer tracking you?

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  • [–] 8 points 2 years ago

    No, I don't. But I already have a workplace with cameras at every entrance and exit, pin pads at every "sensitive" door, and a name badge with rfid in it so they can track my every movement via sensors in every hallway.

    And no, it's not a prison. (It just feels like one, amiright?)

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago

    They probably do, but that's only helpful if you care what door they left out. In my experience, there are cameras for ad hoc monitoring and if needed for legal later. If elopement is a risk, doors are locked except main entries - unless you're dealing with psych, the all external doors are locked. Old folk homes and psych... They're hiring the minimal amount of qualified staff and minimal staff period - and paying equally minimal for a job that can amount to intensive care/security guard/house keeper at an extreme pace.... Shits gonna happen.

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