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[–] 37 points 8 months ago

purple one is to die for

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  • [–] 24 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    People are so toxic that they want to be toxic after they die too.

    I just want to be dumped off at the landfill or ground up and used for fertilizer after giving up any useful organs.

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  • [–] 14 points 8 months ago (7 children)

    It’s surprisingly difficult to get that treatment.

    Just compost me. Throw my body into the green cart. Why do I need to spend so much money?

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  • [–] 9 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    Had this conversation recently when my wife died. She wanted to be cremated with no embalming but wanted a visitation. In the US you have to be embalmed to have a visitation. No amount of pleading to just put her in an ice bath would work sadly.

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  • [–] 4 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    You can't have a visitation with someone who has been cremated? Are you positive thats not a state specific thing?

    Maybe there is something else you can call it? It just surprises me because my grandmother and an uncle where both cremated, and we had services. I thought they were visitations.

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  • [–] 7 points 8 months ago* (3 children)

    I think they meant she wanted her body to be seen before cremation, and the funeral home wouldn't do that without embalming her.

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  • [–] 3 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    because the funereal business is a sham.

    can't have y without x and if you get x you need z. we've conveniently packaged it together in our x-z package for a low cost of $6999. isn't this what the dearly departed would want from you? don't they deserve the best??

    and that's why I'm a complete fucking asshole. I don't deserve the best. I deserve to rot in a culvert on the outskirts of the airport.

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  • [–] 20 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    No added preservatives!

    THEY ARE ADDED PRESERVATIVES!

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  • [–] 19 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    I was gonna say. There's none added because that's what they are.

    "Oops, all preservatives."

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  • [–] 2 points 8 months ago

    "Oops, all preservatives."

    I think mass-produced factory loaves of bread also should include this on their labels because have you noticed the past couple decades that bread never gets moldy anymore, regardless how long it's neglected in its plastic packaging?

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  • [–] 17 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    Metaflow Arterial Conditioner looks delicious

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    [–] 15 points 8 months ago
    [–] 10 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    From left to right; peach, watermelon, lemon, grape, apple, guava.

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  • [–] 7 points 8 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 5 points 8 months ago
    [–] 4 points 8 months ago

    They look delicious, but I want to be deep fried when I die.

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  • [–] 4 points 8 months ago

    I wish I could read all of that text clearly

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  • [–] 4 points 8 months ago

    I'll go with pink or whatever the colour on the right is.

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  • [–] 3 points 8 months ago

    Introfiant for me thanks

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  • [–] 3 points 8 months ago (4 children)

    I'd think anything that involved an open casket would be red tinted. Who wants to see grandma in her casket with visibly green veins...

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  • [–] 3 points 8 months ago

    Imagine getting drunk, breaking into a morgue and seeing this.

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  • [–] 3 points 8 months ago

    What, there's no morticians on this platform to explain exactly what each of these does to a body?

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  • [–] 3 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    You know how when you were a kid you'd mix all the flavours from the soda fountain?

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  • [–] 2 points 8 months ago

    Dodge like the car company? gnarly, going for that complete vertical integration achievement

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  • [–] 2 points 8 months ago

    It'd probably be one of the pink ones, but don't discount the orange or purple options or you might just be missing out. Green is sometimes surprisingly good, too. Yellow's usually something like lemonade, a solid choice, but almost never the best tasting choice and most of the other typical yellow associated flavors are disappointing at best.

    There's a part of me that's morbidly curious how all of these things work and how they're used.

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