If you look closely, floor 13 is actually skipped in a LOT of buildings. It's unlucky

When I bought my house it was listed at 5 bedrooms. There are 3 bedrooms upstairs. I think the Master Bedroom (first floor) is actually supposed to be the living room, and the living room was a dining room.

The fifth bedroom is a room in the back of the house just off the driveway. It's uninsulated, the window is single pane, and none of the outlets are grounded. It's unheated. They had a scrap of carpet out there, but it was just covering the cement floor. I installed an insulated exterior door and threw away the solid wood one. I keep the lawn mower and snowblower out there.

Couldn't we just count the stories from the outside?

When he was in the White House, two of his lawyers would never see him alone to avoid him lying to them and telling them different things.

Sure thing, but his behaviour around lawyers has been known for decades and yet they still took this utterly impossible to represent client. Fuck them.

a kid with chocolate on their mouth and told you he didn't eat the cupcakes.

"Donny, Donny!" "Yes Papa?"

It's the Trump candidacy, presidency, and aftermath were a TV series, we'd be yelling at the writers to make it more realistic.

Now hear me out: Arrested Development, Trump version. Think about it. A family of horrible, dumb people dragging each other down. The family father getting caught doing illegal stuff and running the dumbest defense ever. The idiot lawyer holding a press conference on a shitty parking lot next to a porn shop because noone bothered to check if it was the right Four Seasons (still the funniest thing to happen in the last 2,000 years). I can totally see Eric Trump saying "Illusion, Ivanka. Magic is something a whore does for money."

The only thing missing is someone decent enough to play Michael (which is saying something, because even Michael was a horrible person).

It’s fairly easy to understand, though - his cases are hopeless because he’s plainly guilty. He expects his lawyers to lie for him, endangering themselves, make frivolous arguments, and try anything to delay cases. It raises their profile, but makes them look bad to normal people, and then on top of it, he will simply ignore bills to avoid paying anything. Therefore he’s only left with desperate, incompetent or dumb lawyers. Because nobody reputable would want a client like that.

Title it "Fucking Morons" and make it as serious a documentary as possible.

"I'm a very stable genius!"

Narrator: "He wasn't."

Well, Clinton's situation was actually pretty smart lawyering on his part. So I'm guessing if Trump's team is successful it would be more like a Johnny Cochran prepping OJ situation.

Idiot lawyers are all who are still willing to work for somebody who may not pay them.

Being terrible at their job isn't grounds for mistrial. People are entitled to a defense, not a good defense.

But they probably don't know that, since they're terrible lawyers.

LOL if that were true half the prison population would be on the street right now.

Too late for that. The Trump organization has already been found liable. This is the damages phase. They're doing everything they can to say "okay, it was fraud, but not that much fraud" at this point and the Trump family are all trying to claim they had no idea what happened in their own company.