Man imagine getting bit by a werewolf, waiting eagerly for the next full moon to see what kind of powerful, badass creature you'll transform into... Only to get hit by a ray of moonlight and see this looking back at you in the mirror.

You're going to eat your sarcastic words once the zombie apocalypse is in full swing.

I don't have much experience, but the few occupied coffins I've seen had screws (with decorative wooden balls so you don't need tools) and no hinges at all.