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Ranger wounded, suspect dead in rare shooting at Yellowstone National Park, NPS says (www.usatoday.com)
submitted 2 years ago by [M] to c/news@lemmy.world
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[–] 3 points 2 years ago* (2 children)

My friend, it's so stupid it's looped back around into extremely wise. If you perceive a wildlife threat then the two most effective tactics are:

  1. Put a rock or tree between you and the threat, then keep it between you.

  2. Angrily yell at it while waving your arms to appear large (an air horn or a warning shot is a very effective punctuation)

I've angrily told off dozens of bears.

THIS IS MY BOOMSTICK! SHOP SMART. SHOP S-MART! YOU ONLY GET ONE SHOT. HIS PAWS ARE SWEATY. DARMOK AND JALAD ON THE OCEAN!

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  • [–] 3 points 2 years ago

    I'm really enjoying the mental image of a woods-based comedy thriller, a scene in which I'm loading my shotgun while trying to strategically placed myself against a rock or tree. Shouting threats and trying to reason with a squirrel or whatever that was in a tree, I fire off my shotgun, sending dozens of terrified birds and arboreous rodents fleeing and dislodging a barrage of various nuts and mast that rain on me.

    "It's an ambush!" I cry out before pumping my own leg full of ricochet shot off of my hiding post.

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