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Gobbo disappointment (media.kbin.social)
submitted 2 years ago by to c/rpgmemes@ttrpg.network
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[–] 107 points 2 years ago (15 children)

If a cute goblin woman wanted to claim me as her husband, I probably wouldn't say no.

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  • [–] 132 points 2 years ago (13 children)

    I mean, cute in a 2D depiction, with a lot of detail missing, but think of the reality of the situation.

    Probably smells like shit, literally. Bathes as frequently as she hunts fish.

    Probably has no idea what a toothbrush is, chunks of meat stuck between teeth until the enzymes in her saliva break it down over weeks.

    Anatomically incompatible, probably.

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  • [–] 99 points 2 years ago* (12 children)

    Bro, the genre's called fantasy for a reason.

    Why you gotta ruin my dream of finding someone who loves me for myself? Unrealistic though it might be...

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  • [–] 22 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    If that's the same criteria you use for looking for that someone, and you proceed with an open and courageous heart: it won't be a dream.

    And I would say that we have general artistic conventions of depicting elements the previous commentor suggested: smell lines, meat in teeth, etc.. Their absence from the scene leads me to believe the commentor's interpretation is far from the artist's intentions.

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  • [+] 36 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)
    [deleted]
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  • [–] 14 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    Haven't smelled too many wild animals have you? They generally do smell like shit.

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  • [–] 11 points 2 years ago*

    What wild animals are you smelling? Farm animals often smell bad, but those are domesticated. I've been close to deer, sparrows, rabbits, none of them smelled bad. Some snakes smell bad, but I think that's on purpose, like a defensive stink.

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  • [–] 7 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    You ever smelled a coyote or a raccoon?

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  • [–] 10 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    I mean, the many half races in DnD implies that most races arent anatomically incompatible

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  • [–] 4 points 2 years ago* (4 children)

    There's rules for that and in this case nope.

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  • [–] 9 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Bathes as frequently as she hunts fish.

    Bruh she has two toned hair and it looks good. That woman knows how to use hair dye well. I bet she bathes every day. Or every second day, goblins probably have healthier bathing habits than humans. Humans are so obsessed with cleanliness they don't give their bodies time to apply its own natural measures. You're not supposed to wash your hair with shampoo every day, you'll damage it. And no conditioner above the neck. Your hair's natural oils will come in and you'll have healthy locks that shine. Constantly stripping your hair's natural oils away will just make you dependent on shampoo and conditioner.

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