as a wannabe science/mathtist I totally feel the pain of realizing that I will probably never have any good, original ideas unless I actually dedicate my life to studying the works of people that actually had good, original ideas.
In these people, I see a version of me that didn't tell myself that all my stupid theories of the universe and consciousness are total unfalsifiable wastes of time. It's a type of "high-iq" psychosis.