I like to emphasize " if both wish to".
If that's included in your view, then what's the point of using a unified protocol? At that point we're more backwards than just using a SSO for everything.
You're probably right on me completely misidentifying the fediverse for what it is, as i expected something like resources shared forums for everyone, but got greeted by admin drama as soon as leaving lemmy for a second. In that sense the fediverse really got a PR issue and users here acting high and mighty to someone not getting their perfect system truly isn't helping it.
Gonna wait for bluesky to play out. ATproto seems a lot more than what i initially expected from activitypub.