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me_irl (lemmy.world)
submitted 2 years ago by to c/me_irl@lemmy.world
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[–] 32 points 2 years ago (1 child)

Or you could also have a kid, and they may end up being special needs, which, depending upon how bad, also can't help you. Or you have a kid, and they end up being terrible to the point that your relationship fails when they get older and never want to see you again once they leave.

Having a kid doesn't necessarily mean you're guaranteed anything either. At least in your situation, you have the ability to plan ahead starting early as well as the extra income to throw at whatever solution you find.

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  • [+] -16 points 2 years ago* (1 child)

    Sure, in the majority of cases that's not what happens though, most families care for each other.

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  • [–] 13 points 2 years ago* (1 child)

    My family has been caring for my bipolar brother on and off for over 20 years since we discovered his mental illness around the age of 18. I wouldn't say it destroyed our family, but it's put us all through an extremely stressful existence--and it's not something we can ever expect a permanent solution for. The toll it's had on my parents is staggering. They've been depressed pretty much since he flew off the handle and it's never really gotten back to 'normal' since.

    So yeah, having a kid isn't a guarantee of a happy or purposeful life either. Guess we're just in the 'minority of cases'?

    I refuse to bring children into this world for numerous reasons--and that right there is a big one. I don't know if it's genetic, but I'm not taking the risk of bringing another bipolar person to suffer in this world.

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  • [+] -15 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 child)

    Guess we're just in the 'minority of cases'?

    Eh... Yes, as a matter of fact you guys are? Don't know why I need to debate the principle of anecdotal evidences in this discussion 🤔

    You could also talk to experts to determine if there's increased risks or not in your specific case. My mother has 6 siblings, one of them had one kid who's schizophrenic, that's one out of 15 kids between my mother and her siblings, nothing hereditary about it (not on our side anyway), shit just happens sometimes.

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  • [–] 7 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    I've met plenty of others that have seen mental illness wreak havoc on their families. Sure my experience is anecdotal but wtf else can i draw experience from? Make all my decisions based on probabilities and just hope for the best? Congrats on having a bunch of normal functioning family, sounds nice 😊

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  • [–] -3 points 2 years ago

    wtf else can i draw experience from

    Guess you never had stats explained to you?

    My first message was general. It doesn't apply to your case? Fair enough, you're in a minority. It doesn't make me wrong and it's not an attack against you and you can push the reflection a bit further and tell yourself "Although it's not the case with me, most people are close to others in their family so I guess in most cases it's a form of support when aging that people don't get if they don't have kids."

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