<3 thank you for your thoughtful and insightful reply JW! It really helps me feel a bit less crazy and alone and scared about whatever comes next. Sometimes - maybe more often than not - what we need to help surf the waves of these difficult feelings isn't logical, rational, or based on deterministic left brain approaches, it's a bit of good old fashioned right brain reorganisation by feeling safe and secure and connected in one's body through interacting with others :)