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This is reality (lemmy.world)
submitted 2 days ago by to c/memes@lemmy.world
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[–] 72 points 2 days ago (8 children)

Have... Have y'all considered not marrying partners that you don't share interests with? Like, I know I'm an edge case in that I'm 35, gay, and have never had a live in partner, but it's really not that scary being single until you find someone you actually enjoy being with. Either it'll happen or it won't, but I'd rather be single and able to enjoy my hobbies and passions than be with someone who shares none of them.

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  • [–] 102 points 2 days ago (2 children)

    You don't have to share every hobby. You just need to not shame each other for enjoying different things.

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  • [–] 12 points 2 days ago (2 children)

    Soooo, is buttsex a hobby?

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  • [–] 4 points 2 days ago (1 child)

    I think it takes more dedication than most possess to call it a hobby but I have no doubt that there are some who could rightly call it that

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  • [–] 4 points 1 day ago

    I mean, unless you wanna be unhygienic about it, the amount of preparation involved and gadgets/accessories available to make it easier certainly lands it in hobbyist friendly territory

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  • [+] -10 points 1 day ago (2 children)

    Eh just playing video games isn’t much of a hobby. Most gamers veg like tv watches. I wouldn’t say sitting in front of the tv all day is a hobby. Really low bar for hobbies if so.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 day ago

    Oh no. I lost what i thought was my main hobby. /s

    I think gaming is way more engaging than just watching something where you don't do a thing but watch. There are many games where you actually have to use your brain, maybe make different choices or immerse yourself in a character. Whatever you are into. Of course there is brain-dead stuff too which can be awesome as well at times.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 day ago

    My SO and I don't share interests that much, but we share values and are similar/compatible in so much regards. When we start talking it is hard to stop. We have been living together for 20 years.

    I don't think having shared interests is as necessary as you seem to suggest.

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  • [–] 32 points 2 days ago

    Sometimes you just don't discover everything out about that person even years after being with them. This is especially true when you meet at younger ages. Also everyone changes the older you get. The person you marry can absolutely change over a decade as everything becomes a never ending routine and you each find things you can no longer tolerate as much as you used to when you dated and tried harder (for some reason) to be like the other person. Knowing this now I wish it was mandatory for everyone to wait 5 years before getting engaged and 2 of those years has to be living together. Even then you never know who they will be 10 years from now. The worst part about getting older is wishing you knew all of what you know now but 20-30 years ago so you could have actually applied it when it mattered.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 day ago

    This is the way, I game with my wife nearly everyday.

    Sometimes when we come back from an obligation (visit parents, friends, shopping etc) we stay up later than we should and get a couple rounds of ARAM or whatever crafter builder we’re playing before we sleep because the day feels wasted if we didn’t get a bit of playtime together.

    I’ve dated people who weren’t gamers and it is so pointlessly painful to regret doing one of the things that brings you the most joy in life.

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