Evolution and Abrahamic religions are absurdly incompatible. One day, having just watched the development of organisms for millions of years, God finally gets bored, selects a random species of particularly successful land fish, and gives them a soul.

(Subsequently, he hyperfixates on them for a couple of thousand years, giving them rules and intervening on behalf of a small subset of them, then finds that tedious and disappears again. He pops back to impregnate one land fish, and introduces the idea of eternal life, then when his fish son dies, he gives up on the whole thing and is never heard from again.)