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[–] 5 points 3 years ago* (last edited 3 years ago) (2 children)

My tips for surviving beyond middle age.

Move to a country with socialised healthcare and reasonable unemployment systems.

Develop a mental illness, you're 36 so you probably have a couple already.

Apply for disability and reduce your workload to 20 hours a week.

Have your parents die so you can have a chance at owning a house so you have somewhere to die other than hospice.

Kids are a double edged sword, kill you now, look after you later. Might be better financially to not bother, as you'll have to go back to full time work just for a chance to ensure they don't grow up neglected, and if they do there goes your retirement.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 years ago (2 children)

    Have your parents die? So murder your parents?

    Also Kids are not a double edge sword. You are not supposed to have kids, so they take care of you when you are old. That's just a recipe for them growing up neglected.

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