Hex and grad are tankie instances that are very in your face about it and don't carry the honor of being "the flagship" instance and as a result were easy to widely defederate from which led to most people here not having strong opinions on it

.ml admins are hardcore tankies, but try to maintain .ml as the flagship and thus are more subtle about their tankieness. Instead opting to just censor any dissenting opinions before things get crazy in threads.

As a result many instances are way more hesitant to actually defed from them like they did the rest of the Tankie Triad, thus leading to more widespread visibility and in turn more widespread dissatisfaction of them by most.

Checkout !meanwhileongrad@sh.itjust.works (for those on a .ml account you'll need to use this link because, ironically, .ml admins censor that comm from you: https://lemmy.world/c/meanwhileongrad@sh.itjust.works ) for documented instances of their behavior